Sometimes it’s the little things that make the biggest difference... for me that was just 70mm

Are you aware of how the much the daily little stressors add up in your life?

Of the cost to your energy and performance and presence throughout the day? Probably not. In my experience none of us truly are until we change something and notice the difference. We are by nature a resilient species, we adjust to our environment according to the demands put upon us.

Recently I've been reminded of just how much minor irritations drain our energy and affect not only our performance but also our willingness to do even the things we enjoy.

Those of you who have been following me for a while will know my story of how I decided to overcome a fear of scooters by doing my motorbike license in Germany. If you don’t know that story you can read about it on my website. It’s an important story in my life as well as my work because the techniques I used to reduce my anxiety and get me safely through my lessons and finally my test are the same techniques I use with my clients to help them speak with confidence in high stakes meetings.

Within days of passing my test, I had arranged a test ride and was the proud owner of a 660cc Triumph Trident. The timing was important; I passed my test in November on the last day before bike tests were stopped for the winter due to deteriorating road conditions so in my mind I had to do that test ride and buy the bike as soon as possible before I lost my nerve. Come the spring when my bike arrived I forced myself to go out every week (weather permitting) to solidify the self belief that I could ride a big bike safely, I also practiced training exercises at low speed to maintain my technique and continued to ride roads that challenged me to prove to myself that I could do it.

This might seem like a lot of effort but once you learn a new skill or overcome a fear you need to start gaining experience and generating success stories to strengthen your newly established belief systems about your ability and re-write any old stories of failure.

However, you might have noticed reading this that there’s a lot of pressure and not so much joy resonating from my description. I did enjoy the rides as well, there was the sense of freedom, the amazing scenery and the sense of accomplishment as well, but most trips were preceded by a surge of adrenaline that frequently caused my body to tremble with trepidation.

I knew part of my persisting anxiety was about stability. Most motorbikes are designed for tall people and at 165cm tall I can’t plant my feel flat on the ground of most bikes which results in you having to balance a 500kg machine with your toes. When I came across the Kawasaki Eliminator 500 which has a seat height 70mm lower than my Trident and price tag a fraction of a Harley Davidson, I got curious.

I rode to a dealership nearby with the intention of “Just having a sit on it” to see how it felt,  but ‘Just a sit’ turned into a test ride and within minutes I was smitten with it’s lightness and maneuverability. You could say it was love at first curve and I traded in my Triumph on the spot.

That might seem incredibly spontaneous of me, reckless even, but in those few minutes it hit me how much energy I was putting into ‘surviving the ride’ rather than ‘living the ride’

I have been struck by the lightness I now feel in myself while riding my new Kawasaki, the lack of resistance to go out for a ride, the joy in corners where before there was tension. Only now can I see how much tension I was holding in my body both before and during rides on my old Triumph as well as the exhaustion caused after riding.

That tension is the same tension we all hold when doing something we’re not comfortable with, it’s the same tension you hold in your body when you’re stepping into a new role while speaking a language that’s not your native tongue and leading a team in a country with a different culture to your own. It’s the same tension I help my clients manage and they in turn experience the same lightness when they learn to manage their anxiety and make subtle changes to the tools, techniques and methods they use to get through their day.

Sometimes when we have a major stressor in our lives we need to make big changes, but sometimes we overlook the number of little things that when combined also make a big difference. For me just 70mm difference in seat hight and lower centre of gravity means not only more enjoyment and enthusiasm to ride, but also longer tours, the possibility of taking my daughter with me and less exhaustion.

The financial cost to me was around 1500€ in trade in costs and connected expenses, but it’s worth every cent to me because I can’t put a price on that lack of tension, anxiety or on the increased joy and energy.

So what’s your price?

Next time you feel your heart racing as you present your findings to the stakeholders, next time your voice isn’t heard, next time you lose presence because you’re scanning faces, looking for approval rather than connecting with who you really are and all the skills you bring, next time you walk into a meeting room doubting your place rather than knowing your worth… ask yourself what you would give to feel connected with your confidence and know that you belong.

What amount you would give to feel stirred to speak rather than shaken inside… could you honestly put a price on that?

Coaching with me costs from 375€ a month over 6-12 months and the benefits aren’t just knowing you belong in the rooms where you’re leading, they translate into all areas of your life. As I found with my new Kawasaki, when you ‘re not stressing yourself unnecessarily not only your performance and enjoyment increase, you also have more energy for the rest of your day and you sleep better at night.

How much is that worth not only to you and your team, but to your family as well?

Fancy a chat? Book a call in my diary here